Thursday, September 15, 2011

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Many of you (all 16 of you ;p) have probably been aware of what has happened with the Anthroholic blog and her fraudulent personal shopping services. I feel a little bit out of place posting about this since I'm a very new Anthro blogger and I'm pretty unknown, but I have been an Anthro blog reader for a very, very long time and so I've been reading about all of the events and feel the need to reflect. 

I almost had a transaction with her a couple of months ago. She reached out to me when I posted an APB on an item. She had this item and was selling it at a reasonable price but she was being incredibly pushy about getting payment right away due to her travel plans. Something about her polite pushyness, her unwillingness to look at other solutions and her convenient and ready excuses about travel plans sent red flags to me. I desperately wanted this item but I did not feel good about the circumstances and so after sending emails back and forth for days I reluctantly passed and purchased this item on ebay instead for $100 more. I'm really glad I followed my instincts because until yesterday I felt really foolish for having paid more for this item on ebay.

I just wanted to say how impressed I am by some of the very honest and genuine posts that are being made by her betrayed blogger friends. It's hard to put yourself out there to readers and share your self in such an honest way, it's so easy to hide behind outfit posts and posts about 'things' in the midst of something so hugely betraying and very public. It's hard to take a stand against a friend when you see them behave in such a wrong, and totally incongruent to the person you know behavior. Especially when you don't have the full birds eye view of events and you really want to be able to give them the benefit of the doubt. I just want to say how much I respect the integrity of these bloggers and I respect their words.

These types of things happen in real life every day and sometimes we have a hard time seeing the ugly truth until it really hits us in the face and is too hard to avoid, and sometimes it's just a million tiny offences that never quite hit us in the face. It can make us feel bad and very jaded in people in general and that robs us of being able to experience other more genuine friendships. It felt really good to read these posts this morning and to know these bloggers are sharing their real selves and not projections of a fantasy they want us to believe. I may have had a change of heart about how I shop and my consumer habits but I have not had a change of heart about reading these ladies blogs. 

Some of the ones I've read so far:
Anthro Closet Chaos
The Top Drawer
The British Anthropologist
The Stylish Soprano
Effortless Anthropologie


  1. Shocked when I read this! This is what I wrote on Effortless Anthropologie:

    Wow. This is one hot topic! I just caught wind of the whole Anthroholic issue and I am both shocked and relieved at the same time. Shocked because I can't believe how many people have been affected by Kim's wrongdoing (or scam, deceit, fraud etc etc), and relieved because I thought I was the only one out there who felt wronged by her.

    Here is my story, summed up:

    Sept 7, 2010 - contacted her to help me find a replacement for my coveted Bougainvillea cardigan that my drycleaner destroyed, i pay her via paypal
    Mid-October 2010 - after many emails of follow-up to her (as I've seen the cardigans come and go on eBay) she finally responds telling me she is not done her search and for me to be patient
    Oct 24, 2010 - i buy the sweater on ebay and ask for a refund
    No reply, no reply, no reply (for weeks!)
    Nov 22, 2010 - after i badger her with tweets (since she wasn't responding to email), she sends me excuses, one after the other (didn't i get her email she says, i sent the payment, paypal says the payment went through, i've been busy with so many things) Fine. I back off, give her some space.
    Dec 10, 2010 - I email her again. Where is my refund please? Have you been getting my messages?
    Dec 18, 2010 - she sends me a curt response saying she hasn't been ignoring me but her dad has prostate cancer and she just found out. So, of course, I feel horrible. I send her an email apologizing and telling her my mom has cancer too so I write a long email on support and what helped me.
    No response. Fine. She's busy. I'll give her more space.
    Dec 21, 2010 - I read her blog and she has been shopping, doing all sorts of fun things and galavanting. Doesn't sound like she is too busy with family issues so I sent her an email stating this and if she has time to post on her blog day in day out like normal, why can't she refund my money?!?! (getting quite upset at this point)
    Dec 23, 2010 - FINALLY receive the paypal payment (not a refund, but a payment), but LESS her fee.

    I thought many times to bring it up with the Anthro community, but felt it was an isolated incident. Kim is too well-known of a blogger to be fraudulent. It would ruin her reputation so it must not have been intentional. So I let it go. But i stopped following her blog and tweets.

    So yes, I feel for all of you who fell victim to this fraudulent experience. I, too, feel scammed out of the "fee" she wittheld from my refund. But I guess I was a little on the "lucky" side, considering I received most of my money back.

    I feel compassion for anyone who suffers from being ostracized, and I do feel Kim is suffering right now. She got caught but she must face the consequences of her actions. I am very glad this has come out in the open in order to prevent this type of activity from happening again.

    KIM, if you're reading this, I hope you seek professional help from what seems to be a pathalogical addiction to shop at any means, which has come at the cost of your reputation and readership. It is truly and sadly ironic that your clever name, Anthroholic, is also the perfect summation of your downfall. Please get help. You need it, girl.

  2. Occasionally I Google my Blog. Because I haven't yet figured out how to add link backs such as your's to my Template. I just want to say thanks for your support and respect. It meant a lot to me when I read this.